A concierge for your Italy requests.
Every year, we receive a few emails asking for advice about traveling in Italy. The pattern goes like this: “We’re coming to Italy. Any ideas?” Sometimes there’s a little more detail—dates, a city or two—but often, that’s about it. We usually respond because we love Italy and want to share what we’ve learned. And yes, sometimes we get wonderful thank-yous and even follow-up stories. Those make our day. Other times, the response is…silence. That’s okay, but it makes us reflect on what works and what doesn’t when giving advice.
This post is a reflection on what it means to ask for advice—and give it—in a way that feels good for both sides.
Living in Italy ≠ Free Travel Concierge
Just because we live here doesn’t mean we’re a free resource for planning your trip. We’re not a travel agency. We’re not paid consultants. We’re friends (or acquaintances) who happen to know Italy well. When we respond, it’s because we care, but that doesn’t mean the process is effortless.
Do Your Homework First
Before you reach out, spend some time thinking about what you want. Italy is not one thing—it’s many things: art cities, mountains, beaches, food regions, islands, wine country. A vague “any ideas?” is impossible to answer well. Ask yourself: what kind of experience do you want?
Italy Is Not a Monolith
Many requests come wrapped in romantic notions of Italy, notions often shaped by movies, Instagram, or an American lens. Rolling Tuscan hills, sun-drenched piazzas, and leisurely lunches are real, but they’re not everywhere. Northern Italy is different from Southern Italy. Cities differ from countryside. Gray industrial corridors exist alongside green vineyards. We often feel the need to gently adjust expectations without shattering someone’s dream. That balancing act, being truthful yet tactful, takes time and care.
The Art of Responding
We’ve learned something about ourselves too. Sometimes our replies are too much. Too detailed. Too many options. We want to be helpful, but the result can feel overwhelming. It’s like handing someone a 10-course menu when they just wanted a snack. Maybe that’s why some people never reply? Point taken. There’s an art to responding that’s measured, and we’re still learning it.
Every year, we receive a few emails asking for advice about traveling in Italy. The pattern goes like this: “We’re coming to Italy. Any ideas?” Sometimes there’s a little more detail—dates, a city or two—but often, that’s about it. We usually respond because we love Italy and want to share what we’ve learned. And yes, sometimes we get wonderful thank-yous and even follow-up stories. Those make our day. Other times, the response is…silence. That’s okay, but it makes us reflect on what works and what doesn’t when giving advice.
This post is a reflection on what it means to ask for advice—and give it—in a way that feels good for both sides.
Living in Italy ≠ Free Travel Concierge
Just because we live here doesn’t mean we’re a free resource for planning your trip. We’re not a travel agency. We’re not paid consultants. We’re friends (or acquaintances) who happen to know Italy well. When we respond, it’s because we care, but that doesn’t mean the process is effortless.
Do Your Homework First
Before you reach out, spend some time thinking about what you want. Italy is not one thing—it’s many things: art cities, mountains, beaches, food regions, islands, wine country. A vague “any ideas?” is impossible to answer well. Ask yourself: what kind of experience do you want?
- Food-focused? Art and history? Nature? Relaxation?
- How much time do you have? Two weeks? Five days?
- Any constraints? Mobility issues? Budget? Season?
- What have you loved in past trips? That helps us suggest similar places.
Italy Is Not a Monolith
Many requests come wrapped in romantic notions of Italy, notions often shaped by movies, Instagram, or an American lens. Rolling Tuscan hills, sun-drenched piazzas, and leisurely lunches are real, but they’re not everywhere. Northern Italy is different from Southern Italy. Cities differ from countryside. Gray industrial corridors exist alongside green vineyards. We often feel the need to gently adjust expectations without shattering someone’s dream. That balancing act, being truthful yet tactful, takes time and care.
The Art of Responding
We’ve learned something about ourselves too. Sometimes our replies are too much. Too detailed. Too many options. We want to be helpful, but the result can feel overwhelming. It’s like handing someone a 10-course menu when they just wanted a snack. Maybe that’s why some people never reply? Point taken. There’s an art to responding that’s measured, and we’re still learning it.
Also, to be learned: ask questions back if the request is not specific enough. Simple enough, right?
Say Thank You
This seems obvious, but… say thank you if you receive advice. Even if you don’t use the suggestions. Even if your plans change. A simple acknowledgment goes a long way.
Why This Matters
When we write back, we’re not just listing tourist sites. We’re thinking about logistics, distances, timing, and what might make your trip special. We’re pulling from years of experience, mistakes, and discoveries. It’s personal. So, when the response disappears into the void, we feel deflated.
In a previous post Visitors to Bergamo – The Things We Wish They Would Notice, we wrote about what we wish visitors to Bergamo would notice in the moment. This post deals with the before part: what we wish people would notice when asking for advice before arriving. It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being considerate.
So, if you’re planning a trip and want advice:
We love sharing Italy. We just want the exchange to feel like a conversation, not a transaction.
Say Thank You
This seems obvious, but… say thank you if you receive advice. Even if you don’t use the suggestions. Even if your plans change. A simple acknowledgment goes a long way.
Why This Matters
When we write back, we’re not just listing tourist sites. We’re thinking about logistics, distances, timing, and what might make your trip special. We’re pulling from years of experience, mistakes, and discoveries. It’s personal. So, when the response disappears into the void, we feel deflated.
In a previous post Visitors to Bergamo – The Things We Wish They Would Notice, we wrote about what we wish visitors to Bergamo would notice in the moment. This post deals with the before part: what we wish people would notice when asking for advice before arriving. It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being considerate.
So, if you’re planning a trip and want advice:
- Do some homework first.
- Be specific.
- Respect the time someone spends helping you.
- Understand that Italy is diverse and your dream may need adjusting.
- And please at least acknowledge you received the info, if not a thank you.
We love sharing Italy. We just want the exchange to feel like a conversation, not a transaction.